A year after. « Sol - La Coctelera

And, after a year. Full circle, not a Marry-go-round, certainly.
What, I ask myself, such a question that supossedly I shloud've asked that same year ago. What was lost?

After a year I:
- Have accomplished studies in German and have self taught journalism (the best I can by myself)
- Got a wonderful spot for myself. With a view and a spare room - the creator room I call it.
- Got a pc. A fucking awesome one.
- Books. Great amounts of them, donated, bought, given or just read (Among them my adorable Encyclopedia of Photojournalism that Robyn gave me by the time her house was sold)
-Clothes of any type (the joy of going Op shopping with my girlfriend)

But.

That's part of it. In general my life:
-Grew gigantic out of the sudden. Friends everywhere. I was truly, never alone. I just HAD TO SAY NO TO THAT WHICH ... oh, fuck them, fuck them all. Vicious rats of "first world" "fighting for what is important them" Ha. The same people that feel entitled to look down on you in a cafe, the same ex girfriend that bombed a world in her cause "for happiness".
Yeah, them. Those who got it easy and that never change because they got it all.
My girlfriend, who's 22, owns a house, lives by herlself and pays for her studies told me:
"-those are people that have lived with mom and dad,which their families pay for their studies and which socialcircle have never experience real struggle, but a bit of spoiled behaviour because they live so hipnotized they think people like you are criminals or wierdos with a lack of common sense. You know who they are?-" She said -"they same kids that write Indi rock.They will never sacrifice for growth, real sacrifice, they can't, they're numbed. The cancer of the first world.... ironically, it is them who are fucking supporting green peace.-"
And so forth. My real points were:
In a year I've created:
- Wondelrful relationships with old andnew friends. Family, a wonderful girlfriend with I've been 9 months now.
(The amusing thing is that as soon I left all the hippie rubbish behind, my magical garden manifested)

- 3 jobs, each one representing an aspect of my life, my dreams:

- A coffee maker
- A Teacher
- A journalist (yeah I made it. Even with my "situation")

If my life is shining,
I didn't lose, but the dignity.

Clear is for me that those like the one I left behind will experience that they put on some others.
I did, I pay for my freedom. I Am free.
She didin't acknowledge her own process.
And the shit will hit the fan.
No doubt. There was too much i wasn't aware of at the time an too much I got blamed acussed and abused for.

Love?

Wake up.

A lifetime of forgiveness and amends.

Not everything vanishes with prayers and good intentions.
Not all saints get what they deserved and not all eveil people pay for they're actionsor are condemned.

Takes spirit- Dark and white - to manifest.

Any other moralistic issue (religions, sects, groups, even ideas)
suerly will die.

And so it is!
=)